What Happens in Jersey Should Stay in Jersey
>I try to be a positive person. I try to find a little bit of enjoyment in everything and the things I can’t I just leave alone. Last night, though, I met my match as an optimist.
The “leaving things you don’t like alone” trait is something I’ve tried to rub off on Christina, and it has, so last night when we were channel surfing she had the bright idea to watch Jersey Shore. She knows some people who like to watch it so she felt like she needed to give it a fair shake before she made fun of it.
Sometimes I wish I would keep my mouth shut.
I have NEVER seen any piece of entertainment that is so offensively stupid and devoid of any merit than Jersey Shore. I can’t really say anything that hasn’t already been said elsewhere on the internet, but I was trying not to pay attention and focus on working on my Living Pokédex and the sheer amount of blowout hairstyles and spray-on tans emanating from my television and permeating the room made it impossible for me to focus.
I can’t believe this show exists, let alone people watch it! I mean, I guess if people have a stronger constitution than I do they can watch it just to see how stupid it gets. But really, these people… ugh. You’d think that putting that many ignorant, uneducated, hateful people into one house would cause some kind of black hole to form, but no. It somehow becomes a cash cow for MTV.
(Speaking of MTV, which I haven’t turned on in literally about 12 years, they put a little ticker on the bottom of the screen that lists the song title and artist for any song they insert into their shows, which is neat. Nice to know they’re at least TRYING to work the “M” into “MTV.”)
In my opinion you don’t get a nickname unless you’re posting on a forum, using an online gaming service, or are a rap star. You don’t get to just make one up. “Snooki” just sounds retarded, but I guess it fits since Snooki herself seems to have the IQ of a frozen waffle. “The Situation” is probably one of the most annoying “personalities” (and I use that term loosely) I’ve ever seen. Not only is his name dumb, but he has to work it into every damn thing he says. “Are you getting situated in your current situation?” If I ever meet him (which I hope I never do because I like being smart) I just want to Dragon Punch him and tell him to shut the fuck up. Your name is MIKE goddammit.
This is all I’m ever going to say about this show because I like being positive and not ripping into things, but good lord I couldn’t keep this contained. This makes three negative posts I’ve written, which I guess over the course of a year isn’t too bad.
Maybe my next post will be about pizza. I LOVE pizza.
9 Comments
I like saying snooki’s name.
SHNOOKAY.
My mom threatened to buy me Snooki’s book, And I said go ahead for I will cross out words and letters to make witty sentances.
“Then I toilet the Dog bagel.”
GENIUS.
Heavens to murgatroyd, she has a BOOK? I didn’t even know she could read.
Jersey Shore doesn’t just reflect badly on the state of New Jersey. It reflects badly on humans, and planet earth as a whole. When our insectoid space-overlords arrive, I hope they don’t judge humanity on Jersey Shore.
I know several people that love this show. They always say that watching it helps them feel better about themselves. Somehow, watching a show about a bunch of offensive, dim-witted idiots helps boost their self esteem. Methinks they need a hobby…..
By the way, I found it hilarious that you were working on your Living Pokedex while watching it.
Jersey Shore is a pretty terrible show about horrible people…
However, I find the idea behind the show Birdalplasty to be even more disgusting.
I’m glad that I don’t know anyone who likes Jersey Shore. Of course, before reading this article, the extent of my experience with it was that one South Park episode about Jersey, so I dunno.
I figure that, a lot of the time, most of these people on the show are simply acting like they’re dumb. It’s real easy to do, so I don’t take much of anything at face value, but you wouldn’t catch me dead watching Jersey Shore.
I didn’t know she knew her ABC’s.
Yeah, I don’t get shows like that. Or like all those Housewives shows. Whenever I’m confronted with one, I just wonder how any rational human being could watch them. And then I realise that humans aren’t entirely rational, and I have to go sit in a corner for thinking differently.