Why is it that American game companies always feel like they need to appeal to the lowest common denominator? I don’t mean this in regards to things like not localizing the old Final Fantasy games because they “weren’t accessible to the average gamer”, I mean taking gorgeous boxart and taking a CG dump all over it.

We’ve seen it a lot in the past, and the latest victim is the upcoming PlayStation 3 suspense/mystery game Heavy Rain. The PAL version of the game, released in Europe and Australia, according to Kotaku features this boxart:

It’s subtle, yet strong. The game is about trying to track down a serial killer known as the “Origami Killer” so the paper crane with the dab of blood with the dark, rainy background is almost poetic in its symbolism. That image alone conveys the atmosphere and tone of the game quite well, and is on par with some of the best “teaser” movie posters I’ve ever seen.

So what happens when the game comes to America? Sony Computer Entertainment America needs to remind everyone that, yes, this game has humans in it.

The pictures of the characters are not only distracting, they’re not even INTERESTING. It’s not a scene from the game, it’s a Photoshop nightmare. I do think it’s hilarious the hidden emphasis placed on the boobs though. The female character is right up front with the game’s title draped across her chest.

(Interesting side note, SCEA has offered a ready to print .pdf of the PAL boxart when it comes out here.)

This is certainly not the first time amazing boxart has been absolutely destroyed in order to catch the eye of Cletus and Brandine Wal-Mart, though. The most famous attempt to entice mouth-breathers was when the masterpiece Ico was released. Here is the PAL/Japanese boxart:

It’s beautiful. It absolutely matches the sense of scale of the game, and it’s a legitimate painting by Fumito Ueda, the game’s director, based off of the painting The Nostalgia of the Infinite by Giorgio de Chirico. So what do we get when the game hits the good ‘ol US of A?

Disgraceful. I’m not even going to bother tearing this apart, the cover makes fun of itself.

Even Zelda covers are being dumbed down. Take a look at the Japanese/PAL cover for the recently released Nintendo DS game The Legend of Zelda: Spirit Tracks:

Again, it’s beautiful. It’s bright, colorful, and fun. Zelda is a key player in the game so it’s nice to see her get some attention on the box. Here’s what we got:

I want to see the memo that says Americans will NOT buy games unless there’s a weapon on the cover.

Just to wind this down, here’s the Japanese/PAL art for a few Kirby games:

And in America:

I honestly have no idea why they felt the need to make Kirby pissed off. He’s a pink poofball. He doesn’t really have a lot to be angry about. I mean, even in Smash Brothers Kirby isn’t mean. His taunts aren’t even taunts, he just waves and says “HiiiIIIIiii!” or does a little dance.

We spend so much time debating on the artistic quality of the games themselves that we don’t even realize that their boxart, their first impressions, are being nothing short of defiled. Imagine this being done to movie posters.